


Homesick

by Stingray17



Category: Over the Garden Wall (Cartoon & Comics)
Genre: Beast Wirt, Gen, How Do I Tag, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm Sorry, Original Character(s), Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Tags Are Hard, Tags May Change
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-29
Updated: 2019-09-14
Packaged: 2020-09-29 11:26:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 11,776
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20435219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stingray17/pseuds/Stingray17
Summary: Wirt and Greg are back from the Unknown seemingly unscathed from the event, other than nearly drowning and dying. They try to jump back into normal life, but something isn't right, at least for Wirt. Weird things begin to happen to him, and they aren't normal weird things, they are impossibly strange weird things.





	1. Chapter 1

The DeMayo house was the quietest and cleanest it had ever been, but Jessica felt the worst she had ever felt. The pure silence that she used to dream of was now a horrible torture, and the only way to escape it was to clean. The rumble of the vacuum sometimes was loud enough to quiet her disturbing thoughts, and the intense smell of vinegar forced her to think only about holding her breath. The best distraction came at night, when her husband came home from work. It was always so relieving, when she heard the click of the door being unlocked and seeing her amazing husband peek through the door with a small smile on his face. Today was different, though. This time, Andrew came in swiftly, motioning for her to join him on the couch. When she sat comfortably next to him, he pulled the mail out of his satchel, and flipped through until he found the letter coming from the hospital. Jessica gasped.  
“Is it news?” She said excitedly, leaning in closer as he tore the seal of the envelope. Andrew looked at her. “I think so.” Andrew tugged the folded paper from the envelope and started to read it aloud.

**Jessica and Andrew DeMayo**   
** We are pleased to inform you that your two sons, Walter James Edwards and Gregory David DeMayo, will be ready to go home on November 6, 1983. Walter awoke from his coma on the 3rd, and Gregory has succeeded in holding the appropriate body temperature required for leaving. The frog, identified by Gregory as Jason Funderburker, is ready to go home as well, and is currently living in the home of an amphibian enthusiast. We have no idea what kind of frog Jason is, but we do know that he is some type of intelligent bullfrog.**   
** Walter has a broken elbow, so you will need to get him a physical therapist as soon as possible. Gregory is fine physically but has been telling our staff some strange stories about forests and talking bluebirds. This is most likely some strange dream he had while he was in the lake.**   
** Thank you and have a nice day!**   
** The Aberdale Arizona Children’s Hospital**

Jessica grinned at her husband, who grinned right back at her.  
“They’re coming home! They’re finally coming home! Oh, I can’t wait to hug my boys and show them all the gifts the neighbors brought them! I’ll need to clean their rooms and-“Suddenly, Jessica noticed Andrew’s confused face as he scanned the letter again.  
“What is it Andrew?” She asked, leaning to look over at the letter.  
“Since when does Greg have a frog?” Andrew asked. “How are we going to care for a frog? Also, it never gave us the address of the amphibian enthusiast the frog is staying with.” Jessica’s joyful smile returned to her face.  
“That’s all? Oh Andrew, it will all be fine. We can just ask the amphibian enthusiast he- Jason is staying with. All that matters is that Greg and Wirt are coming home!” Jessica raced to the kitchen and started to make a list of everything she needed to do before they came home. Andrew sunk deeper into the couch. Finally, everything could go back to normal.  
The next day was what Jessica called ‘Preparation Day.’ She cleaned Greg and Wirt’s bedrooms, (Greg’s was particularly messy) bought groceries, got her car cleaned and repaired, called the amphibian enthusiast (apparently, there was a phone number at the bottom of the letter) and scheduled a time to pick up Jason, got a physical therapist for Wirt (the office was only five minutes away. Woo!) and got the stew cooking in the crockpot. Everything was ready for Greg and Wirt to come home. When Andrew came home, they drove off to the amphibian enthusiast to pick up Jason. As they drove, Jessica listed off things they would probably need for the new member of the family.  
When they finally arrived at the house, Andrew started unloading everything that was in the trunk into the backseat of the car, so that there would be room for the frog’s living quarters. When it was finally done, Andrew and Jessica went up to the door and knocked. A very nice-looking young woman answered the door.  
“Ah! You must be the DeMayos! Come inside! I’ll show you where your frog is.” The two DeMayos followed the woman up some carpeted stairs and into a large, warm room covered top to bottom with tanks full of amphibians. The woman led them to a large tank, half filled with crystal clear water. It was a very nice set up, but Jessica could see no large frog in sight.  
“Where is he?” Jessica asked reluctantly. The woman laughed. “Oh, no worries! He is in my frog pond in the backyard! I will take you to see him in just a little bit, I am just going to explain a few requirements of care for Jason.” Jessica listened intently as the woman explained the day night light rotation, cleaning the tank, raising dubia roaches, and keeping the humidity high.  
“Jason is a very unusual frog. I’ve been caring for him as I would an American Bullfrog, but he is much larger and more intelligent. I have discovered that, while my other bullfrogs do not like physical contact, Jason loves it, almost needs it. I will take you out to see him now, if you’d like.”  
On the way to the frog pond, the woman explained how they would need to build a frog pond for Jason, as he was much to big to spend all his time in the tank.  
When they arrived at the backyard, all Jessica could see was a bullfrog paradise. There was a fence around the pond, so that the bullfrogs could not escape. The pond was crystal clear and even had a few fish in it. Small greyish rocks surrounded the outer rim, but larger rocks were scattered outside the pond, for the frogs to bask. The bullfrogs were everywhere, basking on the rocks, hopping in the grass, and swimming in the pond. There weren’t many in the pond, as it was November and was getting a little cold to swim in the water, but one giant frog paddled gleefully through the water, splashing other frogs that were a little too close to the pond. The woman laughed.  
“There’s Jason! Com’ere buddy! Yeah that’s right!” Jason hopped out of the pond and made his way to the gate entrance. The woman reached in and lifted him gently into her arms.  
“I’ve been discovering that he acts more like a puppy than a frog.” The woman chuckled and transferred the frog into the hesitant Andrew’s arms. As Jason snuggled in, Andrew raised his eyebrows.  
“Wow. I really expected him to be slimier. Where did Greg find this frog anyway?” The woman’s smile shrunk a little. “The doctors brought him to me and told me he was drowning with your boys. They said he wouldn’t leave your younger boy’s side, so they thought maybe he was his pet? I got to speak with the younger boy………. Greg……... about Jason. He told me some weird stories, but I got the gist. Take care of Jason. Nurse him back into health.” Jessica smiled.  
“He always did have such a huge imagination.” Andrew laughed.  
As they headed inside, the DeMayos discussed buying supplies for Jason. The woman happily obliged and gathered everything they could ever possibly need for Jason. After paying her a very large amount, they headed out to the car, dragging a toy wagon full of frog stuff behind them. It took three trips to get it all out there. Andrew stared sorrowfully at the pile.  
“How are we going to fit this all in the car? I don’t think even the tank would fit.” After much messing around, they finally got it all in. The 80-gallon tank sliced through the middle of the car, so Jessica rode in the back, leaning as far forwards as she could. Jason was riding happily in Andrew’s lap.  
“Rorop!” Jason croaked happily, wiggling around in Andrew’s lap to get as cozy as he could. Jessica looked at Jason in surprise.  
“I didn’t know he could croak!” She exclaimed, and Andrew laughed. “All frogs croak! Although that croak was truly unique, and deep.”  
By the time they arrived home, Jessica had a back cramp, and Jason had decided he wanted to explore and had made his way underneath Andrew’s seat. Jessica sighed in relief as she awkwardly made her way out of the car.  
“Well, looks like we have a lot more work than we expected.” She said happily, and Andrew looked at her in bewilderment. “You’re happy about this?” Jessica laughed.  
“We’re doing this for Greg, remember? We have one day to set this all up and build a frog pond. It will be fine. You will just need to take off work tomorrow. Might as well since you already will be for the 6th.” Andrew smacked his forehead. “Of course! I knew I forgot something! I’ll call the office in a minute and take um…………... how about four days off. The 5th through the 8th. That way I can have 3 days with Wirt and Greg.”  
Andrew and Jessica began the long process of setting up Jason’s home in Greg’s room. After bringing it all upstairs, Jessica looked around happily,  
“I am SO glad I cleaned his room earlier! We wouldn’t have been able to set this up if it had been a mess!” Andrew grinned at her. “I will say, it’s never looked this good.”  
One hour later the tank was set up nicely with a content Jason paddling through his small pool. Jessica sighed in relief.  
“Finally! Oh wow, it’s seven already! Um, I guess we’re having leftovers for dinner.” Jessica gave Andrew a small smile as he groaned.  
The next day was what they called “manual labor for Greg” day. For seven hours they dug, filled, and set up a pond for Jason. It was 4:00 pm when they finished. Jessica and Andrew stood nearby the pond, admiring their work. It was a quite beautiful pond, to tell the truth. Andrew looked at Jessica wearily.  
“I’m gonna take a shower, you can shower in Wirt’s bathroom if you’d like.” Jessica groaned.  
“I just cleaned it, though! I can’t have it covered in mud and grass when he gets home! I’ll just wait for you to finish. You’d better be quick.”  
An hour later, Andrew and Jessica sat at a table eating leftovers, yet again. Andrew ate slowly, wearily nodding his head as he tried to stay awake. Jessica was quite the opposite though, really. She was filled with the excitement for having a full house again. Sure, there’d be a lot more messes and drama, but at least it would feel like home. Andrew scooted out of his chair and began rinsing his plate and the other dinner dishes.  
“Once we get dinner cleaned, I’m heading to bed. I recommend you join me.” Jessica agreed silently. Soon, Andrew had finished the dishes, and Jessica had wiped the table, and they were lying in bed. Andrew was out, but Jessica had never been more awake. She mentally checked off her list of things that she had needed to do before the next day. Why was she so stressed? Eventually, she fell into the deep chasm of sleep, not even remembering falling in.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Wirt hated the hospital. The plain white walls, the weird clothes, and most especially the nurses that checked on him constantly, acting as though he might collapse any second. That was ONE time, guys. Yeesh. The only spot of happiness in this place was Greg. Greg was somehow able to find something positive about everything in the hospital. He had to take a nap? Oh, well rest is great for the body and soul, so sure, why not?  
Wirt was currently sitting up in bed, listening to Greg ramble about how excited he was to go home in a few hours.  
“Aren’t you excited, Wirt? We get to see Mommy and Daddy and sleep in our own beds and wear our own pants- not that I have anything against these stripy Pjs- and see Jason Funderburker! I hope he is at home now and not with that lady. GASP. WIRT! What if mommy and daddy let us eat ice cream?! Oh oh oh oh oh you know I bet they would! I can’t wait to play with my toys and- “ Suddenly a nurse popped in, holding a clipboard and pen.  
“Oh! You two shouldn’t be up yet! It’s only 6:30! Did you have trouble sleeping?” She asked them, scribbling notes onto her clipboard. Greg grinned happily up at her.  
“YES we had trouble sleeping! We get to go home today! The excitement is so tingly in my very bones and it kept my awake ALL night!” The nurse looked at them worriedly and scribbled on her clipboard furiously. Wirt quickly piped in.  
“We haven’t actually been up all night- we just woke up a few minutes ago! We, uh, we’ll just go back to sleep now. GOODNIGHT!” He gently pushed Greg towards his bed and burrowed into his own covers, blushing furiously. The nurse went to a little whiteboard hanging in their room and began writing things onto it. Eventually, she left, giving them suspicious glances on her way out.  
Somehow, Greg actually fell back asleep (it’s a miracle) and Wirt was able to get another hour and a half of sleep in.  
After breakfast, Greg and Wirt packed all of their things up and got dressed in some clothes their parents had brought them. It felt nice to be in normal clothes again. While Wirt sat on his bed writing poems about how much he hated the hospital, Greg scanned every square inch of the room for any toy he might have missed.  
“I promise you, Greg.” Wirt sighed. “We got all of your toys. There’s nothing to worry about.” Greg looked at him worriedly.  
“But if I DID leave one behind, it would be all sad that it got left behind and didn’t ever get to leave the hospital. I CAN’T let that happen!” Greg continued searching under Wirt’s bed.  
Finally, it was 6:45, the time to go home. Wirt and Greg sat in their rooms impatiently, waiting for their parents or a nurse or anybody to burst through the door and tell them it was time to go home. At 6:50 pm, Andrew and Jessica suddenly burst into the hospital room, huge grins on their faces.  
“Who’s ready to go home?”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Greg and Wirt are picked up from the hospital. Unknown flashback slightly rewritten to work with the story.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hullo!   
I was only able to figure out how to put notes on the second chapter without making them be the notes for EVERY chapter. I am sorry for the horrible writing, i'm not the greatest but I mean, what helps you get better at something than by just doing it? All positive criticism is appreciated and enjoyed, so feel free to bring something up that i'm not doing right or could be doing better  
I kinda pre-wrote 6 chapters so i'm just going to be quickly posting them. Thanks for reading my story!

“Who’s ready to go home?” Andrew and Jessica DeMayo stood at the entrance of the hospital room, huge grins on their faces.  
“ME! ME! ME! ME!” Greg screamed, racing forwards. Andrew bent down onto his knees, bracing for the expected collision of the excited 7-year-old boy to slam into his body. What he was NOT expecting was the impact of a 16-year-old to come with it. Andrew knelt in shock as his son and step-son squeezed his body tightly. Had Wirt EVER hugged him before? He was pretty sure he hadn’t. Wirt always had an aura of hate or annoyance when he was around Andrew, but now all Andrew felt was pure happiness and love. Jessica stood next to him in matching shock. They met eyes, and Jessica gave him a thumbs-up. Andrew squeezed HIS boys even tighter, renewed happiness coursing through his body.  
Greg was the first to pull off from the hug. He turned to look at his mother.  
“Can we go now? I’m Sooooooooo excited to go home!” Jessica laughed and lifted him into her arms.  
“Sure we can! Why don’t you go grab your suitcases, boys? I’m going to go to the lobby and sign you out of the hospital.” Jessica squeezed Greg and then set him on the ground. Greg gleefully raced over to his open suitcase and began dumping his toys and clothes in as fast as he could. Wirt awkwardly sat on the edge of his bed, suitcases already packed. A few minutes later, Jessica entered the room, and the small family left for home. 

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
“GREG! GREG!” Wirt stumbled through the freezing snow, screaming as loud as his frozen lungs would let him. Beatrice flew next to him, struggling against the harsh winter wind.  
“I thought it was this way.” She said hesitantly. Suddenly, from between some trees, they noticed a faint light shining through the snow.  
“A light.” Wirt whispered. He hefted the unmoving Jason Funderburker higher in his arms. Unbelieving, Wirt slowly stepped through the thick snow towards the source of the brightness. They found it covered in snow by some trees in a clearing.  
“A lantern.”  
“It looks like the Woodsman’s.” Wirt bent down and grabbed the black lantern, shaking the snow off of it. What is this doing here? Wirt stared at the lantern confusedly before using its dimming light to scan over the clearing. The snow was destroyed, and leaves and twigs were littered everywhere in an unnatural way. There was even a full branch that looked like it had been snapped off in a struggle.  
“Whoa,” Beatrice whispered. “What happened here?” Wirt continued scanning over the snow, until he suddenly noticed a small foot on the edge of his sight. Wirt gasped.  
“GREG!” Wirt stumbled forwards frantically. A small edelwood stump sat growing in the center of the clearing, Greg encased halfway inside of it. “Greg! Are you-“ Suddenly, Greg’s cold mouth started to move.  
“Wirt?” Greg croaked. Wirt grinned in relief, tears streaming down his frozen cheeks.  
“Oh, Greg.” Greg opened his eyes at his brother’s response.  
“Wirt, I did it! I beat the beast!” Greg began coughing harshly, orange and tan leaves coming out of his mouth.  
“Ah geez the leaves are even going inside of him!” Beatrice said anxiously, staring at Greg’s pale face.  
“No,” Greg spat out another leaf. “I was just eatin’ leaves.” Beatrice gave a small smile.  
“I’m sorry, Wirt.” Greg mumbled, and Wirt stumbled closer, new tears dripping down his face. “No, no, Greg,” Wirt sniffled and rubbed the tears from his eyes. “It’s my fault we ended up here. EVERYTHING’S been my fault. I should’ve been more-“  
“No,” Greg interrupted, shaking his head as much as the confines of his tree would allow him.  
“ I mean my rocks facts rock.” Greg carefully pulled the painted rock from his pocket to show them.  
“What?!” Wirt and Beatrice exclaimed. Greg turned the rock to face him.  
“I-I stole it, Wirt. I stole it from Mrs. Daniel’s garden.” Greg looked to the side, eyes filled with regret. “I’m a stealer. And that’s a rock fact.” Greg waved the smiling rock slowly, as he had done many times before. Wirt looked at him with concerned eyes.  
“What? No,” Wirt set the dimly glowing lantern in the snow beside him. “Greg, that doesn’t matter.” Greg coughed again. “No, it does matter. You have to return it for me, ok?” Wirt’s eyes grew panicky.  
“No!” Wirt pushed the extended arm holding the rock back towards Greg. “You can return it yourself! C-c’mon, we’ve gotta get-get Jason Funderburker home, right?” Wirt lifted the sickly frog up to where Greg could see him, and Jason gave Greg a weak croak. Greg grinned.  
“Jason Funderburker! The perfect……….frog…….name.” Greg fell unconscious slumping to the side. “Greg! GREG!” Wirt panicked, staring fearfully at Greg’s silent form. Beatrice quickly flew on top of Greg’s teapot hat.  
“Let’s get him out of this, c’mon!” Beatrice began pulling on a small branch with her beak. Wirt snapped out of his panicked trance.  
“Yeah, yeah.” Tears dripped down Wirt’s face as he stood and began pulling on the branches.  
“”COME ON!” Wirt screamed, his tiny arms not working like he needed them to.  
“It’s gonna be fine, Wirt.” Beatrice comforted, though she was just as worried for Greg’s life as he was. Suddenly, a low groan came from behind them. Wirt quickly picked the lantern up and spun around, just in time to see the Woodsman fall forwards into the snow, the Beast standing behind him. The beast’s glowing white eyes bore into Wirt’s soul.  
“Give me my lantern.” Wirt narrowed his eyes, confused.  
“YOUR lantern?” Beatrice quickly interjected.  
“No way, we need this thing.”  
“Yeah, I’m keeping this.” Wirt pulled the lantern closer towards him, feeling its comforting heat melt through the coldness in his chest temporarily. Suddenly, he remembered Greg in the trunk. He pulled the lantern off his chest and lifted it above his head so he could better see the Beast’s dark form.  
“I have to get Greg home.” The Beast lifted his arms in a shrug.  
“Your brother is too weak to go home. He will soon become part of my forest. Wirt stood defiantly, glaring at the Beast.  
“I WON’T let that happen!” The Beast slunk a little closer.  
“Well then,” He said slowly, his deep, rich voice playing with the words. “Perhaps we’d better make a deal.” Wirt straightened, confusion and fear evident on his pale face.  
“A deal?” Wirt questioned, and the Woodsman groaned from his spot in the snow. The Beast’s glowing eyes brightened and he moved his arm as he explained.  
“I can put his spirit in the lantern,” The Beast said, reaching towards Wirt. “As long as the flame stays lit, he will live on inside.” Wirt looked into the flame of the lantern, and then at the unconscious form of his little brother trapped in the tree. The Beast stared at him unblinking.  
“Take on the task of lantern bearer, or watch your brother perish.” Wirt’s heart stopped. A chance to save his brother. He should take it. But that would mean he would be trapped in the Unknown forever! Well, it was his fault they were there in the first place. Greg deserved to go home.  
“Come here.” The Beast said, his low voice resonating inside of Wirt’s soul. He should do it. Besides, Greg was worth much more than he was. Greg made everyone happy, while he was just a disappointment. Greg deserved to live on, to make other people and himself happy. Wirt sighed and looked down at the snow.  
“Ok.” Wirt plodded forwards in the snow. Beatrice gasped.  
“Wirt!” Beatrice’s eyes, full of worry, watched as Wirt made his way towards the dark form of the Beast. Wirt slowly set the lantern down in front of the Beast, but before he let go of the handle, he remembered the people at the tavern, warning him of the Beast’s trickery and lies. It couldn’t be that simple. There was some trick here. Wirt lifted the lantern and stepped back.  
“Wait. That’s dumb.” Wirt took several more steps backwards, making his way towards Beatrice. The Beast’s voice deepened in anger.  
“What?” Wirt stood bravely between Beatrice and the Beast.  
“That’s dumb. I’m not just going to wander around in the woods for the rest of my life.” There was some trickery here. Wirt knew it. He knew that giving the lantern to the Beast would not help him OR his brother.  
“I’M TRYING TO HELP YOU.” The Beast’s voice was frighteningly deep, and he leaned closer to Wirt. Wirt glared at the Beast. He had never felt this sort of bravery before. It felt good.  
“You’re not trying to help me. You just have some weird obsession with keeping this lantern lit. It-it’s almost like………….YOUR soul is in this lantern.” The Woodsman looked up at Wirt. Was it possible? He had never even considered it! Suddenly, the entire forest got as dark as death, the only light being the lantern. The Beast roared in rage, glitching all around Wirt, eyes a bright rainbow of neon colors. Never had neon been so scary to Wirt. Pure terror and despair filled every bone in his body. Wirt shakily lifted the lantern, his entire body shaking so hard he was sure he would collapse. The Beast began closing in on Wirt’s trembling form.  
“ARE YOU READY TO SEE TRUE DARKNESS?!” Suddenly, Wirt regained his composure. Wait a minute. The Beast was this angry about him saying his soul was in the lantern, and it needed to stay lit for him to stay alive. Wirt stood to his full height and opened the small hatch on the lantern.  
“ArE YoU.” Wirt quickly cleared his voice, and then said in a deeper, cooler tone. “Are you.” The Beast’s eyes turned to normal and he swooped forwards.  
“Don’t! DON’T!” The Beast screamed, terror strung in every word. And then, as Wirt had done every birthday since his first, he blew the faintly glowing light into nonexistence. The Beast screamed a horrific, traumatizing scream, piercing all of their numb ears. And then, Wirt saw darkness. He couldn’t see, feel, or say anything. It felt like he was in a vat of molasses. He faintly heard Beatrice and the Woodsman calling his name, and then he drifted into an uneasy sleep.  
He vaguely felt himself stand sluggishly, and weakly splutter out that he could carry Greg home. Beatrice was a human, dressed in the Woodsman’s cloak. She was clutching Adelaide’s bird scissors, but he couldn’t remember giving them to her. He felt his back ache slightly as they lifted Greg’s unconscious body onto his back. Had Greg always weighed this much? He slowly lifted his weak, noodle-like arms up to support Greg. He felt Jason Funderburker’s small form clutched against his chest. As his vision slowly cleared up, Wirt stumbled forwards into the dark, wintery forest.  
He felt like he had been walking forever. The more he walked, the more his vision got foggier. He couldn’t feel his legs or feet anymore, and his arms felt like they would snap off any second. Without even realizing it, he stumbled face first into the snow, succumbing to the blackness behind his eyes.  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
Wirt slowly opened his eyes. Where was he? His body didn’t hurt anymore, and he was laying on something very soft and plush. Wait, Greg. Wirt shot up, frantically looking around. Wait a minute. This was his room. Oh yeah. He was in the hospital. And then mom and Andrew came and got him and Greg. Wirt let out a sigh of relief and stepped onto the soft, tan carpet. Suddenly, Wirt noticed something. He was in pajamas. How did he get in pajamas? Hadn’t he left the hospital in jeans and a long sleeve shirt? Wirt felt his entire face go hot. What if one of his parents had changed him into pajamas? Wirt quickly shook his head. No, no. He probably was just so tired last night that he didn’t remember changing. Yeah, that had to be it.  
About thirty minutes later, Wirt was stumbling out of his room, dressed in jeans and a navy-blue long sleeve shirt, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. He plodded down the stairs and made his way to the kitchen, where Greg was already at the table, scarfing down a large stack of waffles topping with nearly an entire can of whipped cream and as many strawberries as he could fit. His mom stood at the counter, pulling a freshly made waffle out of the waffle maker with a fork. She grinned when she saw the sleepy teenager.  
“Good morning, honey! Do you want a waffle? Or maybe some eggs or bacon?” Greg looked at Wirt knowingly, mouth full of waffle, eggs, AND bacon.  
“Yoo shoub gae some.” Greg swallowed. “It’s so delumpfrous.” Wirt smiled at his brother and plopped down into his favorite seat at the table.  
“Yes please. Could I have a waffle?” Jessica placed the freshly made waffle on to a plate and handed it to Wirt.  
“Order up! I’ll let you decorate it with what you want. Anything you want you can have. I’m just so glad my boys are back.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the crappy ending


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wirt gets lost in the woods during a thunderstorm.

It had been a while since Wirt had been truly alone. With all the bustle of nearly drowning, he was never out of sight of his parents or friends. But now, he felt peace. Wirt let out a satisfied sigh as he meandered his way through the large forest near his backyard. The gentle autumn breeze fluffed his messy, chocolate brown hair and shook the trees in a soothing, rythmatic way. The air was clean and cool and smelled of fresh dirt and grass, and the tall trees gave off a protective, enclosing feeling. Wirt had no idea why he suddenly enjoyed the forest’s solitude so much. After the many years of living in this neighborhood, he had never gone further than the outskirts, but now here he was in the very center.  
Wirt slowly made his way to the tree he had found the evening before. It was the perfect tree, tall and strong, with lots of branches and roots. Wirt climbed over the roots and cozied himself between two large roots by the base.  
Wirt experimentally stretched his arm. It now stretched as far as it could before it was broken and didn’t hurt at all. He had been going to physical therapy, but his mom stopped taking him when she saw that his arm was all the way healed. No one knew how his stiff, broken elbow had healed in just a week, and when they questioned Wirt, he told them that he just woke up one morning and it felt back to normal.  
There had been a lot of questioning going on that week. His mom and Andrew wanted to know how he and Greg got into the lake and why Greg was spouting strange stories about frog ferries and cannibalistic spirits. His friends just wanted to know what had happened, asking him how he and Greg got to the lake in the first place, as it was a far ways away from the cemetery wall the jumped over. And his dad, Wirt hadn’t even gotten up the courage to answer his calls and explain what happened.  
But now, he had a break from the stress. Wirt sighed as he slumped deeper into the roots. This place……….felt like home. Wirt closed his tired eyes, enjoying the nice breeze that cooled his face and fluffed his hair. Without even realizing it, he fell into the deep chasm of sleep.  
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX  
“Hey mom, where’s Wirt?” Jessica DeMayo looked up from her magazine.  
“I don’t know, Sweetie. Did you check his room?”  
“Yes. He wasn’t there.”  
“Didn’t his new friends come over earlier? Maybe he’s with them. Don’t worry, I’m sure he’ll be home for dinner.”  
“I think I saw him go into the forest, I’m gonna go look for him!” Jessica was up in a flash, stepping between Greg and the door.  
“You can go if you go with your dad. Why don’t you go get him?” Greg raced off towards the kitchen, screaming at the top of his lungs.  
“DAD! Daddyo! Daddy! We have to go and find Wirt in the forest!” Andrew stumbled out of his bedroom.  
“What happened to Wirt?” He looked worriedly at his wife. Greg laughed.  
“There’s no need to worry about Wirt! He knows perfectly well how to survive in the woods! We just have to find him so he doesn’t miss dinner! We’re having chicken pot pie!” Andrew relaxed, but just barely.  
“Are we sure that Wirt is in the forest? He might be at his friends’ house.”  
“No, no. He’s definitely in the forest. I saw him go in.” Greg gasped suddenly, scaring both Jessica and Andrew.  
“We should bring Jason Funderburker! It will be just like in the Unknown!” Jessica sighed as Greg raced up the stairs to collect his beloved frog.  
“When do you think that he’s going to give up this ‘Unknown’ thing?” She mumbled from the side of her mouth. Andrew glanced at her.  
“Hopefully soon. I didn’t know that his imagination could get so dark. Do you think Wirt told him something that influenced it? Honestly, some of the stuff that he’s told me about could give me nightmares.” Just then, Greg pounded down the stairs, Jason Funderburker perched happily on his hip.  
“Are you ready to go?”  
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX  
Greg and Andrew had been searching the forest for an hour. It was beginning to get dark, and Andrew was worried.  
“You’re SURE he went into the woods?”  
“Yep, I’m sure. He’s gotta be close, we’ve been walking for a while.” They trudged through the forest, sky getting progressively darker. Suddenly, Greg ran forwards.  
“Look! Footprints! I bet they’re Wirt’s!”  
“Why would his footprints be showing up just now and not an hour ago?” Andrew questioned. His heart was beating harshly in his chest, and he was sure that they would suddenly stumble upon Wirt’s brutally murdered corpse any second.  
“They’re obviously Wirt’s. I walked behind Wirt for long enough in the Unknown to be able to recognize his footprint. I’m a professional Wirt tracker.” He leaned down and licked one of the footprints, smacking his mouth loudly, face screwed in concentration.  
“Yep, definitely Wirt’s. C’mon! This way!” He took off in the direction the footprints led, Jason Funderburker hopping at full speed besides him.  
“WAIT! GREG WAIT! YOU CAN’T JUST RUN OFF INTO THE FOREST ALONE! JUST- ARRRRGGHHHH!” Andrew took off after the surprisingly fast boy, attempting to search his pockets while he ran.  
“Gotta have it in here, I know I put it in my pocket-AHA!” Andrew triumphantly pulled a small silver flashlight out of his pocket and clicked it on. The pathetically miniscule light illuminated Greg’s slowly disappearing form.  
“SERIOUSLY GREG PLEASE WAIT FOR ME!” He screamed. How did those stubby legs move so fast?  
“I’ll slow down for you if you want me to. We just need to find Wirt fast, I can smell rain.” Greg called. Andrew caught up to Greg and together they followed the footprints, calling for Wirt as they walked.  
After 2 hours, Andrew was full out panicking. The light trickle of rain had become so hard and loud that they had to yell to hear each other. The sky was illuminated by bright flashes of lightning and then followed by booming thunder. Andrew was torn between continuing to follow the footprints before they washed away or get his small son to safety. Andrew glanced at Greg. He stomped forwards steadily and bravely, harsh wind blowing his short almond brown hair into his eyes. Greg looked up at his worried father.  
“DON’T WORRY DAD,” He yelled, “I CAN TELL HE’S CLOSE!” He grasped his hand and led Andrew through the thick mud. The trees were getting larger. The large roots crisscrossed over the path, and Andrew had to save Greg multiple times from tripping and falling face-first in the mud.  
Suddenly, Greg stopped, sending Andrew stumbling forwards.  
“There he is.” A huge tree towered over them, a maze of thick, giant roots weaving all around it. Andrew glanced around, but didn’t see anything until Greg showed him. A giant block made of tree branches sat, unmoved in the storm.  
“Wait, wait your saying that WIRT IS IN THAT BOX?!” Greg nodded his head. “Well-well then, let’s go up there!” Greg grinned at him and began stumbling towards the tree trunk, where hopefully there would be a ladder.  
There was no ladder. They searched all around the base of the tree, searching for nailed pieces of wood, indents in the tree, anything honestly.  
“How did Wirt even get up there? He can’t climb trees! I’ve never seen him even do anything athletic in his life!” Andrew stared up at the block, planning complicated solutions for getting Wirt down.  
“I have. One time, Wirt climbed a stall door and opened it while he was still on it. Then, as Fred came out, he stood up and jumped onto his back! He even grabbed a lantern off a post as he rode past! That’s pretty cool, and athletic. And another time-“  
“Wait.” Andrew cut him off, walking back towards the tree trunk. Fat roots spiraled all the way up to the block, forming the perfect ladder.  
“Those weren’t there before.” Andrew began climbing towards the cube.  
“Hey wait! You forgot me!” Greg shouted.  
“You wait down here! I’ll be down with Wirt in a second!” Andrew continued climbing. The further he got, the harder it was to keep his grip on the slippery roots. He glanced up, squinting when rain flew into his eyes. There was a small entrance that he was pretty sure hadn’t been there before. Andrew tried his hardest not to look down, but eventually he did in his worry for Greg. He was surprised to see Greg bravely clambering towards him.  
“Greg! You were supposed to wait at the bottom!”  
“I didn’t want to.”  
“Seriously, Greg, climb back down before you get hurt!”  
“Don’t worry, I can do it, in fact, I’m almost…………….up………………to…….You!” Greg hung on the spiral Andrew stood on, smiling proudly. Andrew sighed in defeat and slowly made his way through the entrance of the cube, making sure not to step on Greg’s tiny hands. When he had gotten secure on the flat floor of the cube, he pulled Greg in.  
“This place is so cool!” Greg exclaimed. Andrew glanced around. He couldn’t see anything. The only light source was the small hole they came through.  
“C’mon, let’s just find Wirt.” He reached deeper into his pockets, hoping for a new, brighter flashlight.  
“Aha!” He pulled out a large teal flashlight. His pockets were a flashlight treasure trove. “Why didn’t use this before?” Greg shrugged.  
Andrew clicked the new flashlight on, and began swinging it around. At first, all the saw was branches and leaves until,  
“There he is!” Greg bounded forwards, tripping on Andrew’s boot. Andrew swung the light towards Greg’s voice.  
Greg knelt by an unconscious Wirt in the corner, brushing leaves off of him. Andrew rushed forwards, heart thumping loudly in his chest as he checked Wirt’s pulse. He let out a loud sigh of relief when he found it.  
“Do you think that he’s just asleep?” Greg asked, poking his older brother’s cheek. Andrew gently shook Wirt’s body.  
“Yup.” Andrew knew what Wirt was like when he slept. It took forever to wake him up. He remembered a past family vacation where they woke up an hour earlier just to wake Wirt up so they could leave in time. Ah, good times. Andrew sighed in defeat as he began scooping the limp teenager into his arms.  
“Wait, what are you doing?” Greg asked, standing up with him.  
“Well, Wirt sleeps VERY deeply, and I don’t think that he is going to wake up any time soon. So, I’m going to carry him home.”  
“Oooooooohhhhhhhh ok.” Greg began climbing out through the entrance. Andrew looked at it in despair. How was he supposed to climb down with Wirt in tow?  
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX  
It took 45 minutes just to climb down the tree. Andrew finally stumbled onto the ground, sweet relief flooding through him. Ok, now just to get both boys home. He was sure Jessica was worried sick. It had been 2 hours and 45 minutes, and they had thought it would take, at most, and hour. Suddenly, Andrew looked at Greg, panicking.  
“Didn’t you bring Jason?”  
“Oh yeah! Don’t worry, he’s just in my pants.”  
“Rorop!”  
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX  
Jessica was in full panic mode. She was just about to call the police when the front door burst open. She raced out of the kitchen. Andrew was carrying Wirt, and all three were sopping wet.  
“What happened?!” She exclaimed, rushing forwards to check on Wirt.  
“He just fell asleep. You know how hard it is to wake him up, so I just carried him.” Andrew slipped his boots off and lay Wirt gently on the couch before plopping next to him, breathing deeply. Greg ran up to Jessica after freeing Jason from his pants and taking off his shoes.  
“Yeah and Wirt built this huge treehouse thing that he was sleeping in! It was so cool! He should probably build windows though because it was very dark.” Jessica laughed.  
“I’m glad that’s all it was! I was ready to call the police!” Jessica walked over to the refrigerator and pulled out a large chicken pot pie.  
“Well, it’s not warm anymore, but I’m sure it will still taste good if you pop it in the microwave for a few seconds.” Greg gasped and raced towards her, grabbing a plate from the counter.  
“YES! I am sooooooooo hungry! Walking in the forest for forever does that to you.” Jessica chuckled as she scooped a large slice onto his plate.  
“When are you ever not hungry?”  
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX  
“What happened?” Wirt was sitting up on the couch, glancing all around the dark living room. One second, he was in the forest, taking a short nap, and the next he was waking up on the couch at 2:00 am. He stood slowly, wincing at every creak. He carefully made his way up the stairs and into his room, where he collapsed onto his bed. Even though he wasn’t that tired, he fell asleep the second his head hit the pillow.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wirt goes back to school for the first time since Halloween. Also Greg assaults him with roaches.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this chapter is pathetically short. I'm sorry about that.

“Hey Wirt! Wirt! WIIIIIIRRRRTTT! Get up now or I’ll drop this roach on you!” Wirt shot up and quickly scurried into one of the far corners of his bed, staring angrily at his younger brother. Greg laughed and stuffed the dubia roach into his pocket.  
“Thank goshness your awake! I was scared you’d NEVER wake up!” Wirt sighed and slowly crawled to the edge of his bed, willing himself to get up.  
“And why wouldn’t I? I always do.” Wirt grumbled, staring grumpily at the floor.  
“Well,” Greg began, throwing himself onto the bed next to Wirt. “You WERE asleep nearly all day yesterday, so I assumed you’d be well rested by morning. BUT NOPE! Still asleep! And grumpy too!”  
Wirt glared at him and finally stood up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. “I was not asleep all day.” Greg laughed.  
“Yes you were!”  
“Wait, did you put that roach in your pocket?”  
“Yup I did!” Greg stuffed his hand into his pocket and pulled out the large, dying roach. Wirt glanced at it and shuddered.  
“Please get that out of here! What if it got away from you and laid eggs all over my room?” Wirt shuddered again at the thought.  
“Don’t worry bro, these little buggers couldn’t survive a week without me! Plus, this one is a boy roach. He’d probably just play in your bed for a little bit before dying.” Greg playfully dangled the roach in front of Wirt’s face, chuckling in anticipation.  
“GREG, NO! You and your roach are no longer welcome in my room!” Wirt smacked Greg’s hand away from his face and pushed him out the door. Right as the door closed, Greg began banging on it.  
“WIIIIRRRTTT!! Wirt, we have to go to school today! C’mon Wirt! WIIIRRRT! WWWIIIIIRRRRT!” Wirt sighed and cracked the door open.  
“What?”  
“We’re going to school today! Mom said to get ready and then come downstairs for breakfast.” Greg said excitedly before racing off to his bedroom. Wirt dragged his hands down his face. Noooooooooooooooo.  
Thinking of all the excuses he’d have to make, Wirt meandered his way to the closet where he roughly pulled out a tan collared shirt and some pants. He had been hoping that he would be allowed to stay home until Thanksgiving break, but that was just wishful thinking.  
It’s alright, Wirt, just make it through school and then you can go back to your tree. It will be fine. Maybe nobody will even ask you about Halloween. And if they do, your pretty good at making excuses. Wirt sighed, slightly comforted by his thoughts, but also doubting them. He knew he was no good at making excuses.  
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX  
High school was worse than Wirt remembered it being. Wirt trudged through the grimy halls, staring straight at the ground with his arms tucked close to his body.  
_ You can do this, Wirt. Just avoid any physical contact and don’t talk to anybody. Then, maybe, you can get through the day without completely humiliating yourself. Just keep walking. Nobody even sees you. That’s it. Homeroom is just right there. Just a few more steps-_  
“Hey Wirt!”  
_ No no no no no no no nooooooooo. Maybe I can hide behind that trashcan before she sees me, or-_  
_ “_Where are you going? You know I can see you.” Sara happily trotted over to Wirt’s petrified form. Wirt quickly stood up straight and pressed his arms to his side.  
“Oh hi Sara I didn’t see you there oh look at the time I should really get going to homeroom so-“  
“Seriously Wirt we have 30 minutes until we have to go to class.”  
“O-oh.” _Dang it dang it dang it dang it dang it. What do I doooooooo?!_ Sara laughed and punched him in the shoulder.  
“Hey, no reason to freak out! I just wanted to ask if you wanted to hang out with us later after school. You know, just hanging out, catching up.” Wirt took a deep breath.  
“Who’s ‘us’?”  
“Oh, you know, me, Jason, Emma, Peyton, Joseph, maybe Kathleen, Rhondi, and Helen. We’re going to meet at Jason’s house at 6 if you want to come.” Wirt glanced to the side, avoiding eye contact.  
_There goes my plans of a nice walk through the forest._  
“Um, ok, yeah, sure.” Sara smiled at him before walking to her locker with a small wave goodbye. Wirt’s heart melted.  
_Maybe it won’t be so bad._


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wirt is a champion at being awkward...and hungry hungry hippos

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hullo guys!   
I apologize in advance, this was one of my crappier chapters.   
Info you will probably need to follow:  
Joseph is the kid with the cardboard box on his head  
Emma is the girl dressed as a witch  
Peyton is the girl dressed as a penguin  
Kathleen was the girl dressed as a rabbit  
Rhondi was the one dressed as an egg  
Helen was the tall girl dressed as a cowgirl  
Hopefully you know Jason and Sara

The ride to Jason’s house was probably more awkward than it should have been. Wirt sat scrunched in the passenger seat, dragging his hands down his face and moaning dramatically.  
“Mom, what if they decided they DIDN’T want to invite me? What if they forgot I was coming? What if-what if Sara invited me without telling the others and when I knock they will all stare at me because they don’t know why I am there? How about I just won’t go. That’s a good idea. Let’s just turn around. I-“  
Jessica chuckled and reached over to rub her son’s hunched back.

“Honey, it will be fine. They wouldn’t have invited you if they didn’t want you there! I’m sure they just want to hang out with you! So just be yourself and everything will be fine!” Wirt let out a rattly breath as he tried to straighten his posture to show his mom that he was confident.  
“This is why I drove you, Wirt. If you’d walked, you would have backed out a while ago and just hid in your tree house for the rest of the night.”  
Wirt sighed in despair as the car pulled into the driveway of Jason Funderberker’s house. Jessica turned and looked at Wirt, a small smile on her face.  
“Just have fun, Sweetie. Everything will be fine.” Wirt smiled back at her and slowly stepped out of the car, wishing the car ride had lasted just a bit longer. As he slowly shuffled down the long driveway, he turned and looked back at the car, where his mom was smiling encouragingly at him.  
Before he knew it, he stood in front of the large wooden doors. He could hear loud talking and laughing coming from the inside, and could slightly see shadows moving around through the large window in the door.  
_Oh, dang it. There’s a large window in the door. They can probably see me standing here! It’s not too late to back out. If mom’s gone-_  
Wirt turned around, only to see his mom’s car STILL sitting in the driveway. When Jessica gave him a reassuring thumbs up, he quickly spun back around to stare at the door.  
_Nope. No escaping for me. Ahh why did I agree to this?! If I could go back in time I would have walked faster, or-or maybe told Sara I would be busy. It’s too late now. JUST do it. C’mon. You can do it. Maybe you’ll have a really good time and, OK JUST KNOCK!_  
Wirt suddenly brought his hand up to the door and rapped solidly three times, brain still disbelieving in what his arm had done. He could hear shuffling inside the house, and then the locks clicking as they were unlocked.  
_ Oh nooo, the door was locked. They weren’t expecting anyone else! What’s a good excuse, uhh, I came because I’m selling cookies for Greg’s class. No, too dumb. I, uh, I need to see the homework assignment because I didn’t get it for some reason. Or-_  
The door swung open to reveal a long, brightly lit entryway. Jason Funderberker stood in the center, hand still resting on the doorknob of the front door. He grinned at Wirt’s awkward form standing a good three to four feet away from the door.  
“Come on in, Wirt!” Jason motioned for him to come forwards and stepped to the side so that Wirt could come in. Once Wirt was completely inside the house, Jason shut the door and turned back to face Wirt.  
“Everybody is in the Livingroom playing cards right now if you want to head in. I’ll be there in just a second, I’m going to grab some more snacks.” Jason smiled at him one more time before walking off towards the kitchen, leaving Wirt to stand alone in the entryway.  
_ What should I do? Should I wander the house looking for the Livingroom or should I stay here and wait for Jason? Ahh, I should have payed more attention to the direction he pointed. Was it left? I’m pretty sure it was left. But what if it was right? Or just straight forwards? I need to move. It will look weird if I just stand here and wait for him. Maybe-_  
Suddenly, a voice cut through his thoughts.  
“Hey Wirt!” Wirt’s spun to face the voice as Sara walked into the entryway and towards him.  
“I was wondering when you would get here! Come on, everybody is over there playing Uno!” Sara walked up to Wirt and grabbed him by the sleeve of his navy-blue jacket before leading him past the kitchen and around the corner. For the most part, Wirt just stumbled as he tried to keep up with Sara’s fast pace (She was a speed walker) but occasionally, he could afford to glance up at the walls around him.  
The Funderberker house was a very clean and nicely decorated place. It looked like the home of an older couple with no more kids left at home. As Wirt scanned the footprint-less wooden floor and the large amount of breakable objects, he wondered how a family with four kids managed this so well.  
Finally, they arrived at the Living room. The Living room matched everything else in the house. There was a small, unscratched leather couch around a glass coffee table, where all the other teenagers sat playing what looked like an intense game of Uno. Sara dropped Wirt’s sleeve and smiled at him.  
“C’mon, let’s go join. Their game is almost over, so we can join in pretty soon.” Sara trotted over to the couch and plopped into a vacant spot. Wirt stood awkwardly where she left him, glancing around at the decorations of the room to appear less awkward. Suddenly, while Wirt was scanning a light grey wall pretending to be intrigued by the paint job, Joseph began shuffling on the couch, urging the others to scoot to the side.  
“Come sit down, Wirt!” he called, patting the cushion besides him with a welcoming smile on his face. Wirt glanced at the now vacant spot before shambling over and slowly situating himself between Joseph and Kathleen. Right as he sat down, Jason Funderberker stumbled in, a few bowls of snacks in his arms.  
“Ok guys, I brought snacks!” He said proudly. Joseph and Emma began clearing spots on the coffee table as Jason stumbled blindly towards them. Sara quickly nudged Emma and they scooted down the couch to make a spot for him. Right as Jason was sitting in his spot, Joseph slammed the deck of Uno cards onto the coffee table, making every single person jump.  
Joseph stared silently at the cards for a moment, waiting until all eyes were on him. He slowly looked up at them without moving his head, a creepy smile spreading across his face.  
“Let the games begin.” He breathed, shuffling the Uno cards menacingly before passing them out.  
And thus the games began.  
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX  
The game night ended at 11 o’clock. After thirteen games of Uno and many other rounds of any other games that could be found in the Funderberker game closet (including Hungry Hungry Hippos) people were beginning to leave.  
The few kids that couldn’t drive sat on the couch, waiting for parents to come pick them up. Wirt was among those kids. Wirt sat scrunched in a corner of the couch, trying to keep his head from nodding forwards as he slowly slipped asleep. He was just. So. Tired.  
_ When will she beeeeeee here? I can’t last much longer. So. Tired. Maybe I can just rest my eyes for a second. Just a quick rest. Yeah. Just a quick…….rest………_  
Suddenly, he was being jolted from his dreams of going home and sleeping by something shaking his shoulders.  
“Hey Wirt! Wirt! Are you awake? Your mom is here, you need to get up!” Wirt sleepily blinked his eyes at Jason, who was now clad in fluffy green pajamas. Jason grinned when he saw Wirt was awake.  
“Finally! I’ve been trying to wake you up for forever! Your mom is waiting in the driveway.” Wirt stared blankly at Jason’s face, barely realizing that he was actually awake.  
“My mom………….is in the driveway?” Wirt glanced around the room tiredly. It was now completely dark and empty other than Jason and himself.  
“Did everyone else leave?”  
“Yeah. Peyton’s dad came and picked her up about 20 minutes ago. She was the last one other than you.” Jason stepped away from Wirt as he pushed himself out of the spot on the couch and into a standing position.  
“Well, I’ll just-I’ll just head out now if that’s alright.”  
“Yeah. I’ll walk you to the door. We just need to be really quiet because my family’s mostly asleep.”  
“Ok.”  
The boys walked silently towards the front door, stumbling blindly through the dark house. When they finally arrived at the wooden door, Wirt turned to face Jason.  
“Um, well, thanks for inviting me.”  
“Sara invited you.”  
“Oh yeah.” Wirt stood awkwardly resting his hand on the door knob, desperately just wanting to book it for his mom’s car.  
“You were pretty good at the games though. Where did you get your talent in Hungry Hungry Hippo?”  
“Um, Greg really likes it, so I play with him a lot.”  
“Oh. That’s cool.”  
Wirt awkwardly smacked his lips.  
“So, I’m gonna go………” Wirt slowly turned the door knob, staring at Jason the entire time.  
“Alright. Have a good night.”  
“I will. uh, you too I mean.” Wirt stepped into the frigid November air, slowly closing the door behind him. It was finally over. Wirt let out a sigh of relief as the door shut behind him.  
That was so awkward.  
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX  
“So, how was it? Better than you thought, right?” Jessica grinned smugly as Wirt let out an exasperated sigh.  
“It was alright.”  
“Only alright! What made it just alright?”  
“I don’t know. I’m just tired. Let’s go home.”  
Jessica chuckled and pulled out of the Funderberker’s driveway.  
“Greg’s been waiting for you this entire time. He fell asleep on the couch because he refused to go to bed until you were home.”  
“Is he still there?”  
“No. Once he was asleep Andrew carried him to his bed. He’ll be excited to see you tomorrow though. Be prepared!” Jessica chuckled again and rubbed Wirt’s shoulder.  
“I’m just so glad you two are finally getting along.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heheh  
all this awkwardness comes from experience.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The return of the rock.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize in advance for the severe crappiness. All was written at 2 in the morning, and my brain was pretty much as broken as it could get.

The rock was the source of all his problems. It sat there on the shelf, pretending to be innocent, but Greg knew what it represented. He knew. It stared him down with those placid, greyish-blue eyes, plaguing him with memories of snatching it from Old Lady Daniels garden and hiding it in his large, green pants. He didn’t deserve the candy she had paid him with.  
Greg sighed as he crumpled up yet another piece of paper and tossed it over to his garbage can. Why couldn’t he just come up with the perfect plan? It should be so simple, just return the rock and be done with it. But there were so many ways he could do it.  
The small alarm clock on his desk flashed 1:00 as he started scribbling on another sheet of paper, biting his tongue in frustration as he misspelled apologize.  
_ It’s alright! This is just a rough draft for just me to look at. I can misspell all I want. What matters is the plan._  
The second the clock flashed 1:10, Greg was pushing his way out of his chair triumphantly holding the notebook paper high in the air.  
“I finally did it.” He whispered to himself, staring at the paper in disbelief. “The perfect plan. I have to show this to someone!” Immediately Greg began running to the other side of his room where a large terrarium sat on his dresser.  
“Jason! Hey Jason! I finally did it! Wake up!” Greg excitedly tapped on the glass, and inside the terrarium, the large toad stirred from his slumber. Jason raised his head slowly, staring at Greg exhaustedly.  
“Hey! I thought you were nocturnal anyways!” Greg accused, wagging his finger at the sleepy toad. “Ok, just pay attention, alright?”  
Greg cleared his throat and straightened the paper with a flick of his wrist.  
“Alright, step 1. Write note to Old Lady Daniels. Make it sincere. Step 2, Ask Mommy to help me make brownies. Step 3, Load all the stuff into a basket. Step 4, get home from school and grab the basket. Step 5, walk to Old Lady Daniels house. Step 6, Ring the doorbell. Step 7, stay calm and apologize about the rock and give her the basket. And finally, Step 8, wait and see if she forgives me or hates me forever. If she is in-between, offer free yard cleaning.” Greg inhaled deeply and grinned at Jason Funderburker.  
“So what do you think? Do you think it will work? I was confused about which treat I should give her, but I figured, if brownies are my favorites, then they must be hers, right? I might still throw in some candies to make up for the candies she payed me with. Just to make it up to her even more. I don’t have very many good kinds though. Mostly just Smarties. And Wirt says those are gross sugar tablets so Old Lady Daniels will probably agree. I’ll keep thinking about it at school tomorrow, and you come up with ideas at home, kay?” Greg gently set the plan on his desk and threw himself onto his bed. “I’m just so ready to get this over with.” Jason croaked in agreement.  
“Well, we should probably get to bed. Big day tomorrow! Night Jason.” Greg clicked off the light of his lamp and began wiggling underneath his covers, indifferent to the fact that he was still fully dressed. After a huge yawn, Greg slumped into his pillow, already fast asleep.  
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX  
“IIIIIIIIITTTT’SSS time to get up in the morning!” Jessica burst into Wirt’s bedroom, and began opening all the windows in his bedroom.  
“Time to get out of bed!” Jessica yanked the covers off of her teenage son’s tired body, exposing him to the coldness of the real world.  
“It’s time to get out of morning or I’ll SLLLLAPP ya outa bed!” Wirt groaned and pulled a pillow over his head.  
“Mom, whyyyy? I have an alarm set! I technically don’t have to get up for three more minutes!” Jessica chuckled.  
“Honey, you know that you wouldn’t actually wake up for another fifteen minutes, right?” Wirt just groaned and shuffled deeper into his pillows.  
“Well, I’m gonna go get Greg up. If you’re not up and getting ready by the time I’m done, you’re grounded inside for the rest of the day.” Jessica walked out of the room, satisfied when she heard shuffles coming from the bed.  
Greg was much easier. The second she burst in singing he was sitting up on his bed, grinning widely while rubbing the sleep from his eyes. Jason Funderburker wasn’t as forgiving. After giving her a look, he went into one of his hides.  
Greg yawned and slid off the side of his bed. “Morning, Mom!” Jessica smiled and ruffled his hair as she passed.  
“Good morning, bud! How did you sleep?”  
“Pretty well. Hey mom, could you help me make some triple chocolate chip brownies for Old Lady Daniels? I’m going to give her the rock facts rock today and I wanted to give her the greatest treat along with it.” Jessica began pulling some clothes out of Greg’s closet.  
“I might be able to get that done while you’re at school.” Greg’s grin lit up the whole room.  
“You’re the greatest mom ever!” Greg hopped off his bed and hugged her legs tightly, as he was too short to get much higher than her waist. Jessica chuckled.  
“I’m glad I could help. Now why don’t you get dressed? The bus is going to be here in 30 minutes!” Greg pulled away from her legs and gathered the small pile of clothes she had gotten out for him. Then, Jessica left.  
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX  
“Today is the day! Today is the day! I’m getting it done ‘cause I didn’t yesterday! The time has come, to get it all done, so this is why I say, today is the day!” Greg skipped joyfully across the sidewalk, chanting his new little song. A smile tugged at Wirt’s lips as he watched the little boy skipping slightly ahead of him.  
“What are you getting done?” Wirt questioned. Greg stopped skipping and allowed himself to walk at a gentle stride beside Wirt. It was actually more of a fast walk for Greg, but that didn’t matter.  
“I’m gonna give my rock facts rock back to Old Lady Daniels!” He exclaimed, a large smile on his face. “I even did it the way you would! I made a plan to tell me EXACTLY what I should do at every moment!” Wirt sighed and dragged his hand across his face.  
“Greg, it probably wouldn’t be very smart to use me as your role-model. I’m not exactly.......I’m not the most........most socially well-off person out there.” Wirt looked into Greg’s large, innocent, chocolate brown eyes.  
“Just do it the way you would do it. Socializing comes naturally to you. Use that gift. Don’t try to stoop to my level socially, you know that all of my plans mess up horribly in the end.”  
“You’re plans don’t mess up horribly.”  
“Do you remember Halloween?”  
“Yeah........but it turned out all right in the end!”  
“It really didn’t..........” Wirt looked down at the sidewalk, trying to suppress the memory of the many awkward and embarrassing conversations he had that night.  
“Yeah it did! You talked to Sara the Bee instead of just watching her from the fence! Your plan made it so that you could do that!”  
“Actually, Greg, most of what happened didn’t go according to plan. Just.......go with the flow, like you always do. Maybe some plan, some of your own stuff.”  
Greg tapped his chin, staring at the sky in thought. “Wellll, I guess that does make a little sense.........” Wirt smiled and patted Greg on the back.  
“Don’t worry, you’ll do great! Mrs. Daniels will definitely forgive you! Just be sincere.” Greg grinned at his older brother.  
“You know, you’re the greatest brother in all existence.”  
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX  
The whole thing seemed a whole lot scarier now that he was actually was doing it. It brought a whole new meaning to the saying ‘easier said than done.’ He had never understood it until now. Greg stood stiffly in Old Lady Daniel’s front lawn, just in front of her pristine white gate. He could see the spot where the rock had lay in the flower garden, the reddish-grey mulch still slightly flattened against the wall of the house.  
Greg was never scared. He obliviously skipped through all of life’s problems, and somehow still managed to come out on the better end of it. So why would this be any different? Greg’s small fingers clutched the woven gift basket’s handle tighter, and he felt an anxious whimper fighting its way up his throat. Why was he so nervous?  
_Just do it! Remember the plan! Remember what Wirt said! Everything will be fine. Just fine._

Greg took a deep, shaky breath. It was ok. He was already half-way there, why stop now? He stared down at the basket, smiling in appreciation as his eyes landed on the fresh batch of triple chocolate brownies wrapped in plastic wrap. It would be alright. Everything would turn out fine in the end, like it always does. With this motherload of emotional support, nothing could stand in his way!  
Greg felt the familiar confidence returning to his body, surging through his blood like hot cocoa......or something. Before he knew it, he was marching through the gate and onto the front porch of Old Lady Daniels house.  
He gently placed the basket besides him, quickly rearranging everything into nicer positions. He was ready. After clearing his throat a few times and running through his apology plans in his head, he pressed a stubby finger to the doorbell.  
He listened to the light pinging sound of the doorbell echo through Old Lady Daniel’s house, debating whether or not it would be better if she just didn’t answer. And then, the lock was clicking, and the door was opened. Old Lady Daniels stood in the doorway of her home, looking slightly surprised to see the small boy standing at her door.  
“Why, hello Gregory! I didn’t expect to see you today! I’m sorry, but I don’t have any more jobs for you today. But I do have some taffy in the kitchen if you would like a piece!”  
“No thank you, Old lady-Mrs. Daniels. I just-I just needed to tell you something.” Greg swallowed and wiped some of the sweat off his forehead. Old Lady Daniels stood attentively.  
“I-I did something that was not good.” Greg stared at the ground, fidgeting with the hem of his jacket. _Ok, come on, you can do this, just tell her the story, give her the basket, and go._  
“That night, on Halloween, you know the one? The time that I was helping you in your flower garden and I fell in the mud puddle? That night? And you know your line of pretty, painted rocks that are against your house and are colored with cool things like ladybugs and rainbows?” Old Lady Daniels had a slightly nervous look on her face, but she nodded. With a sullen look on his face, he pointed to the empty, flattened spot where the rock facts rock used to stand.  
“I-I took it, Old Lady Daniels! I took your most favoritest rock for myself like a selfish stealer would do and that is a bad thing to do and I knew! It was just so amazing and pretty a-and perfect and I still d-did i-it! I-I’m s-so sor-sorry.” Greg sniffled, using the back of his hand to wipe his dripping nose.  
He slowly and shakily reached behind his legs, procuring a small basket full of tiny gifts for his elderly friend.  
“This-this is for you.”  
Old Lady Daniels pursed her lips and brushed a puff of lilac hair off her forehead, before sighing softly. She gently placed a hand on the small boy’s shoulder.  
“Gregory.” Greg quickly looked up, tear streaks running down the length of his cheeks.  
“All people make mistakes. You’re not a horrible person. In fact, you’re a great person, one of the sweetest little boys I have ever known.” She took a deep breath and knelt down to Greg’s level.  
“What matters is that you sought to fix your mistake. You cared enough to try to fix your mistake, and make it better, no matter how hard it was.”  
Greg rubbed his eyes and looked at her, barely able to believe that she was actually forgiving him. He slowly lifted the gift basket and rested it on her kneeling knees, making sure it didn’t topple over the second he let go. Old Lady Daniels smiled softly at him and shifted her attention to the contents of the basket, searching for a moment until she found what she was looking for.  
“Thank you for returning the rock, Gregory. I am so happy to have it back with me. You see, this rock was hand painted and shipped by my little granddaughter when she was just a little girl about your age. It holds a place dear in my heart.” Old Lady Daniels stood and gently placed the rock into its former spot, fluffing the mulch up a little bit so it looked natural.  
Greg shifted where he stood, wiping the tears and snot from his face as he watched her. As soon as she finished, she walked back to her porch where Greg was still standing and knelt to his level once again.  
“I hope you’ve leaned a good lesson from this, Gregory. It was wrong of you to steal, but it was a learning opportunity for you. Don’t let this little mistake trip you up. Instead, use it as a booster to get farther in life! You’re a great kid, Gregory. One of the best I know.” She smiled reassuringly and ruffled his light brown hair.  
“Also, thanks for the brownies. How did you know I loved brownies?” Greg smiled, finally feeling the last of his guilt induced grief wash away.  
“Just a feeling.” He said quietly. And as Old Lady Daniels stepped into her house with a small wave, he couldn’t help but grin widely and burst into loud, cheerful songs as he skipped down the sidewalk on his walk home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heh..yeah, I suck at writing adult advice. Or really any advice ever given.   
Constructive criticism is welcome@


End file.
